So...a few people have asked about the need for a househelper. There have also been some questions about day-to-day life. I figure if a few people have asked, even more are probably wondering.
Hopefully my good friend Hollie won't mind me listing the questions she asked -- it helps me know what interests people. Since we have lived in Asia before none of this surprises us or seems new to us. But for those who haven't lived overseas, this is all so different.
"Do
you think you can explain the differences between here and there that
make a house helper a necessity there? I know it is common in some
other countries and I am so curious to know more about what it is
like!!!"
Here is how I answered her:
1) It is just expected that as westerners (ie "rich") that we provide
employment ($) for local people. To not do so would be rude and
hurtful.
2) Practicalities -- oh my. Everything takes sooooo much longer here. The washing machines are TINY. There are no dryers (well, there are but the electricity won't support them). In the wet season, nothing dries so EVERYTHING has to be ironed. There is not hot water in the kitchen so you have to boil water for dishes. You have to let dishes drip dry because the water isn't safe. The houses are all tile and it is DUSTY here so they all have to be mopped at least once a day. Most food has to be made from scratch -- not much pre-packaged stuff (or if there is, it costs a fortune). I went grocery shopping for the week today and it took 5 hours -- no way I am dragging kids through that. Etc. etc. etc. With a family, there just really isn't any way to go without a helper. Even middle to upper class Indonesians have them. A full time (40 hours a week) helper costs around $60 a month plus transportation (around $20). How could you NOT get help for that, especially when it means the livelihood for a local person?
And then she wrote back with more questions: But I was curious to know the ins and outs of
what you have to do to keep house there. It certainly is a lot! But
I am curious now--how do you get safe drinking water? Or water for
cooking? Is the water okay to use for a shower? And do you divide
the responsibilities of the house between you and your house helper? Does
she do your cooking? Can you share the types of food you eat there?
How do you get safe drinking water? We have a water cooler/heater stand that holds 19liter water bottles. We just have them delivered.
Water for cooking? It depends -- if what I am cooking is going to boil, I use tap water. If the water is not going to boil for at least as few minutes, I use water from the water cooler. For doing dishes, we boil the tap water (there is no hot water in the kitchen sink).
Water for the shower? The water is fine to shower with. We just have to be careful to keep our mouths closed. For the kids, it is a bit trickier and we have to watch them carefully that they don't drink the bath water or suck on washcloths. The master bathroom has a hot water heater -- it is tankless and runs on gas. As the water goes through the heater it heats up. We don't have a bathtub (but hoping Santa might bring us one because we actually have room for one). Currently the kids are bathing in rubbermaid tubs (three in a row, which they think is the coolest thing ever!)
Do you divide
the responsibilities of the house between you and your house helper? This may change a bit as we get to know our househelper better (she just started yesterday). But basically, when she is here she does lots of the housework -- dishes, laundry, mopping, etc. She will also help out with the kids when I am away (especially when I start language school). However, even though she is here and helping I still clean up after myself, cook for the kids, make school lunches, and do all the kid stuff. As she gets to know the kids better she may do more, but this will be only because she wants to and not because "I don't feel like it." After the weekend (when she is not here) I will get laundry started so it is ready to hang when she gets here. She leaves at about 2:30 in the afternoon so after that, I am on my own. At night I will clean up from dinner and may or may not do the dishes. If I have time I will do them (remember, this is a long process -- boil water on stove, wash dishes in a big plastic tub, rinse dishes with more boiled water, etc). If I don't have time or if we are going out, etc., I will rinse them in tap water and leave them for her to do in the morning.
Does she do your cooking? Some people have their helpers do all their cooking. I like to cook, so we won't be doing that. Our specific helper is supposed to be a really good cook, though. There may be days when I will have her prepare dinner and leave it for us to heat up when Jason gets home from work. I also hear that she makes a great apple pie -- but so do I so we may just have to have a show down ;)
Can you share the types of food you eat there? So far, we haven't been too impressed with Indonesian food (which is really too bad, since we loved the food in India and in Malaysia). It is VERY oily and nothing has been good enough that I would crave it. That could change though. At home, we will eat "normal" stuff. When I was in India I learned to cook a lot of things from scratch and learned to substitute what we couldn't get. That will come in very handy here as many things aren't available or if they are, they are super expensive (8 oz of cheese costs $5 and a box of brownie mix costs about $4). We haven't had an oven so up until now we have done a lot of stove-top cooking. We eat a lot of rice and PB&J's have been a regular occurrence (all my kitchen stuff is in our shipment which we haven't gotten yet). We can't afford a regular oven right now so we had our helper find us an Indonesian oven that fits on the stovetop. We have heard that lots of people use them and like them. I will give it a try today -- not bad for $18.
For eating out we have lots of choices. There is local Indonesian food that is very cheap. You can also find Chinese. Bandung has quite a few fast food options as well -- KFC, McDonald's, Pizza Hut, A&W, and even a Wendy's. They aren't all easy to get to, but they are there. We also have Starbucks, Dunkin Donuts, and my personal favorite (on a recommendation from Vicky) J CO (btw, Vicky, did you know that KL has one?)
____
Tomorrow I will give you a little photo tour of the everyday things that won't seem "everyday" to you. Just little differences of what things look like, how we do things, etc. I hope you enjoyed learning a little bit more about life here. If you have other questions, please feel free to ask!
Thanks, Janet! That is a huge help so I can understand what it's like there a bit. And of course I don't mind that you posted my questions (but then again, I know you wouldn't have if you thought it could be a problem). Anyhow, I really do appreciate you taking the time to answer all these questions and I am fascinated by it (along with other cultures in general). And I'm sorry you don't care for the food (so far). Hopefully you'll find some things that are more to your liking:) Have a great day/night!
Posted by: Hollie | August 26, 2008 at 10:08 AM
oh, thank you so much for sharing....you are right, I'm sure lots of us were wondering about the daily stuff and I can't wait to hear more. Sounds like you and the family are really settling in!
Posted by: Leslie (lhaslem) | August 26, 2008 at 08:11 PM
Thanks for sharing, Janet! I am always so interested to see how differently things are done in other places. I think that it's awesome that you guys are adjusting so well!! Can't wait to see photos!!
Posted by: KirstyB | August 26, 2008 at 08:19 PM
You hit it right on the head!! There are so many similarities between Indonesia and the Philippines that you might as well have been describing my homeland. Our household helps actually become some sort of family to us. My grandmother had a laundrywoman who continued to do the laundry and ironing for my mom. A couple of her daughters and in-laws were our help for a few years too. I think she treats us as her family too. When I moved to the States and she found out that I was doing all the chores, she literally burst in tears (accdg. to my mom) and wished she could come over to help me.
anyway, thanks for sharing. It's fun to read of your experiences and gain insight on a westerner's view of the local culture.
Posted by: Joy | August 26, 2008 at 11:20 PM
Wow! How interesting is all this! I had no idea....now I'm really not taking the Costco and Walmart for granted. Wow..so are you allowed to get goodie boxes? Or do they not allow food/treats through customs?
Posted by: Jenn | August 27, 2008 at 12:03 AM
Whoops..the above post was mine...but wrong email! LOL
Posted by: Shabby Miss Jenn | August 27, 2008 at 12:04 AM